how to improve communication in a relationship

How To Improve Communication In A Relationship–It’s Key!

By Noell Romatowski

8.15.18-Are you wondering how to improve communication in a relationship? Explore this article to learn why it’s key to having a healthy and happy relationship.

Tell Me The Ways

Communication is essential in our lives whether be in a friendship or intimate relationship. It gives a sense of happiness, belonging and relate with others.

It’s a practice we all have worked on our entire lives on how to communicate with others and will continue to work on.

Do you have a partner who runs away at the first mention of wanting to talk or share how you feel about something?

Or is your mate Pphubbing (partner phone snubbing) and doesn’t engage or show interest in real conversation?

Relationships need healthy effective communication to survive and to make both parties happy.

Just because you talk to each other doesn’t mean you are having healthy communication.

Many couples state they talk all the time, but truly don’t know any details about what their partner does for a living, their family or their past.

Here are some key ways to improve communication in a relationship:

Show Interest

When your partner is speaking don’t be scrolling through your phone or thinking about what you want to say next.

Show that you are truly interested and engaged in what they are sharing with you.

9 times out of 10,if you aren’t showing interest, your significant other will start to share less and less with you.

In turn that will start to affect the relationship and will feel one sided.

via GIPHY

Watch for Ques

Have you ever seen your partner go from listening to you to folding their arms?

This could’ve meant they are being closed off or defensive to what it is you are speaking about.

No eye contact, could mean they are bored about what is you are saying, you have spoken too long or they are uncomfortable to share something with you.

Does your partner voice get louder, that usually means they are either getting angry or feel like they aren’t being heard.

Is he/she rolling her eyes,you could be offending them or they are well over what it is you are sharing.

Nonverbal ques or signals are VERY important to pay attention too when you are communicating.

These actions can be so much more important than any words someone can say. So be present and pay attention!

via GIPHY

Express Feelings

We all have those moments where we would rather crawl in a hole than share or express how we are feeling about a situation or possibly something your partner has done.

Expressing your feelings shows your vulnerability and creates intimacy with your partner.

You want to be able to be with someone you feel 100% comfortable showing all the range of feelings from anger, fear to joy.

What Do You Need

Are you comfortable asking your mate for those things that you may need? A hug, a foot rub, for them to cook dinner or show up on time for an event.

I am not speaking of demands from your partner, but what do you need that makes you feel like you are connected and have good communication.

Making sure of course to share those needs with each other in an effective and calm way.

Small Talk

Do you think the only way to communicate is to have long detailed and deep conversations?

In Pyschology Today, John Gottman and Janice Driver did research on small talk within couples.

Even sharing the smallest details within a story or making a list together and spending time all creates a way of getting closer.

When your partner is sharing a story, ask questions, even the smallest detailed question will show them you are interested and you care.

Listen and Be Heard

Everyone wants to be heard and validated. This especially is true in a relationship.

It isn’t necessarily agreeing with them when they are sharing, but showing you are listening and hearing them speak.

Some simple gestures are a head nod, smiling, eye contact or verbally saying,”oh yes”, “I understand” or “I could see how you would feel that way.”

If someone is sharing, make sure to politely ask if you can interrupt to ask a question or gain clarity.

This will show respect and that you are engaging in the conversation.

Don’t Over Talk or Over Share

We all have moments or days when so much has happened we want to talk, talk and talk some more.

Some people are much better at listening and may not feel as comfortable at sharing especially if their partner is a dominant speaker between the two of them.

It’s great to share and talk, but make sure at some point you stop and engage your partner.

Ask them how they are doing? You could even joke and say now that I have talked your ear off, I want to hear all about you and your day.

Make sure both of you get to share and listen to each other often.

via GIPHY

Do Fun Meaningless Things Together

I know this may sound really simple, but I am shocked at couples who don’t do the simplest and fun daily things together.

Eat dinner together without the TV or cell phone’s on. Watch a TV show or movie together. Cooking and cleaning up after dinner together. Reading books or kindles together.

My mom always says if you can sit next to each other, not do much or say much and enjoy each other’s company, that speaks volumes.

Do You Truly Communicate?

Now, after reading this article do you feel that you and your partner have a healthy happy relationship with good communication?

Do you share, but allow your mate to do so as well ? Are you fully present and engaged in the conversations?

I hope these key tips will help bring you closer to each other and improve communication in your lives and your relationships.

Cheers to communication in love!

XO

Always love to hear from you—noell@thedatingbliss.com

 

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About Noell Romatowski

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