Top 9 Warning Signs Of GaslightingBy Noell Romatowski
Do you know the top 9 warning signs of gaslighting? Do you question yourself or feel like you are being manipulated?
Read this article to discover the top 9 warning signs of gaslighting.
What Is Gaslighting?
Let’s state this first and foremost. Anyone is subject to gaslighting. It is a very common tactic for many narcissists, abusers, political leaders and cult leaders.
Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation in which a person seeks to sow seeds of doubt in a targeted individual or in members of a targeted group, making them question their own memory, perception, and sanity per definition on Wikipedia.
Most victims don’t even know it is happening as it done with slow progressive measures from the gaslighter.
Let’s explore 9 warning signs of gaslighting.
Have you ever experienced where you know the person is outright lying to your face? You know it’s a lie and they don’t skip a beat in what they are telling you.
Lying is all part of gaslighting, as than you won’t know what is a lie or the truth. It keeps you off-kilter and always questioning them and yourself. That is what they want.
Read more about narcissist CLICK HERE
Questioning a gaslighter is the worst thing, because they will go to extreme lengths of denial. They will even turn it around on you saying that you made it up.
Even if you have proof that it is a lie, they will still deny it. I had proof that my ex was cheating on me with photos and more evidence and he still found a way to deny it and make it seem like I was the crazy one. It is unbelievable!
3-Wear Down Tactic
This is probably the most insidious thing about gaslighting is it gradual and over time.
It will start with a lie here, a little lie there, denial, manipulation and it will start to ramp up from there.
Here are a few comments that if often said by gaslighting individuals;
- You’re so sensitive
- You’re so insecure
- You sound crazy stop acting crazy
- I was just joking
- It’s no big deal
The heat is turned up slowly, you never realize what’s happening to you until you are on fire.
4-Actions Do NOT Match Their Words
Wow that sounds so amazing! They can talk the talk, but can they walk the walk.
So many gaslighters are amazing at telling you what you want to hear. In the meantime, not one action matches what they said.
Or they will do the action somewhat or once in a blue moon to get you thinking okay cool see they do what they are saying.
Don’t be fooled it’s all part of the gaslighting tactics!
5-Curveball Of Positivity
This person is possibly calling you names, cutting you down with the things that matter to you most and than the curve ball of positivity comes in.
Let’s be real this is very uneasy feeling and confusing as hell! This is when you start to doubt your feelings about them and thinking see maybe they aren’t so bad.
This is again to keep you off-kilter and make you once again question yourself.
Have you ever had someone accuse you of something such as cheating when they are the ones doing the cheating?
Doing this master projecting puts you in defensive mode. You start to feel like you have to explain every move you make or things you do constantly.
It’s perfect for them, as soon the focus is off of them!
Gaslighters find their group of people that will find them and stand by them no matter what they say or do. The key for them is to have followers, so they can use these people against you.
Often they will make comments” Well they think you are lazy and worthless human too.” “This person agrees with me that you are wrong.”
Most times no one is even saying this or who is “they” anyways. They use this as another way for you to question your sanity and behavior.
This plotting in turn makes you question everyone around you and pushes you right back to the gaslighter’s den.
8-You Are Cra Cra
This master technique is to make yourself and others think you are losing your mind. That you question everything you say and do.
They have gotten you to the point of thinking you are crazy so that way if you start to question or tell others about the gaslighter they will not believe you.
This person has already planted so much information or shall we say many, many lies to these other people that they won’t believe anything you would say about the gaslighter.
Do you feel like you are constantly say you are sorry for literally everything?
It is exhausting and you feel like you have to apologize for everything that is happening. Did I even do anything wrong no, but it just becomes automatic to say you are sorry.
Many will even apologize and blame themselves when the gaslighter cheats. It sounds crazy,but that is the state of mind one is in from the constant wear down of the gaslighting.
You Are NOT Crazy
I know I said it before prior in the article, but even the brightest, smartest individuals can be involved in gaslighting.
Become aware of the signs, read, learn and share about gaslighting.
Send this article to a friend and loved one to make them aware of these signs as well.
Here are some great books that I have read that share in more detail about gaslighting:
Would love to hear from you and your stories!